Political Dipsticks

I was listening to a radio talk show last night as I drifted off to sleep. The topic turned to the upcoming presidential election. The host observed that many of the "undecided" voters are actually Hillary Clinton supporters who feel that Hillary was cheated out of the nomination.

Louise from Boston called in and said she was a Hillary supporter would never vote for Obama because he stole the nomination from her. The host tried his best to convince her that she was being short sighted but to no avail. I could tell he wanted to let her know how dumb she is, so let me have at it:

Louise,

Did it ever occur to you that maybe, just maybe Hillary ran a lousy campaign? She blew off the Iowa caucuses and nearly lost New Hampshire. Luckily she turned her sneer into a tear and found her voice before all was lost.

Louise, she ran her campaign with her experience as a cornerstone when the voting population wanted a change. She then gave them change when she turned into the candidate for change. She was making change on every street corner after New Hampshire, and some of that change was the dopes she had running that campaign.

Who are you going to vote for Louise? Nader? He's a bigger loser than you will be if you don't vote for a mainstream candidate. So, Louise, you going to vote for McCain? The antithesis what Hillary stands for? You'll love it when McCain appoints those nice Supreme Court Judges that take more of your liberties away. The right for a woman to chose will be the first among those liberties.

Louise, you're a teacher, you're well educated, and you're dumb. Your tantrum will cost you dearly. How about 4 more years of an unfunded No Child Left Behind act? How about 4 more years of sending Billions to reconstruct countries we bomb the crap out of for no legitimate reason at the expense of funding education for Americas kids?

If you continue to pout you will be responsible for spreading your dumbness to the very kids you are trying to educate Louise. If you don't vote at all, it is your right to do so, but remember Louise, by not voting you will be letting people who are dumber than you are control your fate.

Wake up Louise! How can you sit there on your pompous butt and believe that you are a caring member of the American society. You are a whiner Louise, and you are dangerous because you believe you are right.

Hey Louise, Guess what? I voted for Hillary in the primary. I honest to God did Louise, but I knew as soon as I saw Hillary's victory speech and Obama's concession speech that I had made a big mistake. Hillary lacked the grace Obama showed in congratulating his opponent and she has not found that grace to this date.

I am now a firm supporter of Obama. I will consider Hillary when she runs again but this time, I am voting for the nominee that is consistent with my ideals and can get this country back from the mullahs of the Christian Coalition.

So Wake up Louise and smell the coffee......Stop pouting, take a deep breath and vote for Obama! Your dumb tantrum is going to hurt all of us.

How Dumb Am I?

I'm not a genius, but then it doesn't take a genius to look around and see that Americans are dumb and getting dumber. I used to listen to a talk show host here in Boston. He was a genius and he would always say "There are dumb people out there, you know them and I know them, we see and hear them every day".

I would always laugh at that statement, I always held that as long as the dumb people don't interfere with my life, let them be. Now, I am not so sure letting them be is the right thing to do and I'm quite sure that they are interfering with my life.

I'm not an elitist. The dumb people I see and hear every day are from all walks of life. College grads, high school grads, dropouts, CEO's, Presidents, criminals, priests, talk show hosts, janitors, waitresses, and on and on. Nor is being dumb an ethnic issue, I'm white but I see a rainbow coalition of dumb people out there.

I'vealways wanted to point out to these people just how dumb they are, but often they are on a radio talk show or talking to a reporter on TV or standing in line at the grocery check out so talking to them is not an option.

Being unable to talk to these dumb people has been an increasing source of frustration to me and so, I am going to use this space to talk to them. I find that talking to these people is often like talking to yourself, so this would seem to be the perfect venue.

There will be those of you out there who will recognize yourselves in these pages. I feel for you, I really do. Most of those who recognize themselves here will think I'm the dumb one. I might be, but just try to convince me.

I see dumb people say and do dumb things every day. I'm going to pick the daily dumbest and vent here on a frequent basis. I'm sure that you dumb Americans will never stop giving me food for my thoughts.

You won't see any of these observations on the news and I know none of you read newspapers so you won't even know if I found today's dummy there. This isn't a remake of Oberman's worst people in the world shtick either. It's just my way of getting the dumb stuff I see and hear off of my chest.

And so my fellow Americans, ask not what your dumbness has done to me, ask what I have done with your dumbness.